The Wildhearts

Sent this on to a Maccem mate of mine.

He liked it.

Ilsa wrote:Sent this on to a Maccem mate of mine.

He liked it.

Oh I reckon he more than liked it! Could almost hear him smile from here this afternoon!

Relegation Races (to the tune of Blaydon Races), and taken from a Sunderland site:

They all went down to Villa
Twas on the 24th of May
Hoping God would smile on them
Upon the Sabbath day
Proud as punch in stripey shirts
Cream of the Geordie nation
Ganning along to Villa Park
To see the relegation

Chorus:
Oh me lads, you should've seen them crying
Watching the shambles on the pitch
Premier dreams a'dying
All the lads and lasses there
All had gloomy faces
Ganning doon to the Championship
With aal of Shearer's aces

Now way back in September
They told a different tale
Keegan's second coming?
How could the buggers fail?
But then along came Dennis Wise
Who dared to travel norf
Kevin didn't like the twat
And quickly buggered orf!

Oh me lads! I think they need a genie
Owen unfit, Xisco's shit
and what of Collocini?
Given's a great keeper
but he left the sinking ship
And Harper will be canny good
Doon in the Championship

Now after Keegan scarpered
They all cried in their beer
But fear not, up next they got
Good old Joe Kinnear
He fucking came and fucking got
the cunts to play their best
Then who'd a fucking thought it
a cardiac arrest

Oh me lads, the bugger’s in the Freeman
Ashley's scared
to watch a game
The fans are all a steamin'
And I will not apologise
for nasty tasteless quips
It'll do the buggers good to be
doon in the championship

With poor Joe confined to bed
For his recuperation
They wondered who could be the man
To save the 'Geordie Nation'
Who could turn this team around
Before they turned to violence?
Hughton got the nod and came out
To the sound of silence

Oh me lads! I'm ganna chuck me seat in
The mackems beat us at their place
And now we've had to cheatin'
Then aal the toon went on the hoy
And got themselves all plastered
And raised a glass to Taylor who’s
A cheating diving bastard!

Ashley looked around and saw
the damage that they’d done
He’d lost a couple of hundred mill
For every game they’d won
He sank another pint in one
And had a revelation
Mary Poppins is the one
To save the Geordie Nation

Oh me lads! The Toon are aal but dead
Obafemi’s injured (or at least that’s what he said)
Ah can’t believe with Alan boss,
We haven’t got much higher
Or is he just like Keegan
Just another false messiah

Oh me lads! The Toon are in the clarts
No more trips to Anfield
Now it’s off to foreign parts
Tell aal the cheeky mackems
That this story isn’t over
Follow the Toon Army AND……
We’ll watch Donny Rovers!

hahaha fuckin class.

Mattie wrote:Relegation Races (to the tune of Blaydon Races), and taken from a Sunderland site:

They all went down to Villa
Twas on the 24th of May
Hoping God would smile on them
Upon the Sabbath day
Proud as punch in stripey shirts
Cream of the Geordie nation
Ganning along to Villa Park
To see the relegation

Chorus:
Oh me lads, you should've seen them crying
Watching the shambles on the pitch
Premier dreams a'dying
All the lads and lasses there
All had gloomy faces
Ganning doon to the Championship
With aal of Shearer's aces

Now way back in September
They told a different tale
Keegan's second coming?
How could the buggers fail?
But then along came Dennis Wise
Who dared to travel norf
Kevin didn't like the twat
And quickly buggered orf!

Oh me lads! I think they need a genie
Owen unfit, Xisco's shit
and what of Collocini?
Given's a great keeper
but he left the sinking ship
And Harper will be canny good
Doon in the Championship

Now after Keegan scarpered
They all cried in their beer
But fear not, up next they got
Good old Joe Kinnear
He fucking came and fucking got
the cunts to play their best
Then who'd a fucking thought it
a cardiac arrest

Oh me lads, the bugger’s in the Freeman
Ashley's scared
to watch a game
The fans are all a steamin'
And I will not apologise
for nasty tasteless quips
It'll do the buggers good to be
doon in the championship

With poor Joe confined to bed
For his recuperation
They wondered who could be the man
To save the 'Geordie Nation'
Who could turn this team around
Before they turned to violence?
Hughton got the nod and came out
To the sound of silence

Oh me lads! I'm ganna chuck me seat in
The mackems beat us at their place
And now we've had to cheatin'
Then aal the toon went on the hoy
And got themselves all plastered
And raised a glass to Taylor who’s
A cheating diving bastard!

Ashley looked around and saw
the damage that they’d done
He’d lost a couple of hundred mill
For every game they’d won
He sank another pint in one
And had a revelation
Mary Poppins is the one
To save the Geordie Nation

Oh me lads! The Toon are aal but dead
Obafemi’s injured (or at least that’s what he said)
Ah can’t believe with Alan boss,
We haven’t got much higher
Or is he just like Keegan
Just another false messiah

Oh me lads! The Toon are in the clarts
No more trips to Anfield
Now it’s off to foreign parts
Tell aal the cheeky mackems
That this story isn’t over
Follow the Toon Army AND……
We’ll watch Donny Rovers!

He also approved of this.

A lot.

Hehe!

There was a belter of a piss take done in Glasgow on Sunday.

Celtic needed a win and to hope Rangers would drop points to take the title.

A group of Rangers fans informed their Celtic minded friends that they would text them any news from the Rangers game.

The Celtic fans are informed of Dundee United's "goal" against Rangers - Just a shame Utd never actually scored.

Sorry Col!

No need to apologise, it's class!

fella walks into a brothel in Rome

"What do you want?" sez the Madam

"I'm into S&M, so I want humiliation" responds the fella

"40 Euro" sez the Madam

"What do I get for that?" asks the fella

"a Man United shirt"

There should be an apostrophe in Shearer's.

Idiot mackems..... ha ha